Jisatsu
by aPlaceToCallHome
Summary: When Roxas can no longer deal with his pain, he fixes it the only way he knows how....by himself. Akuroku


**A/N: First shot writing something outta Naruto!! Hopefully I'll grab their personalities right XD Anyway, these are based off of the drawings **rainbow cupcake **drew, I hope she likes them :3 The link's at the end of the story.  
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**Warnings: Suicide…!DX and… Yaoi...Please don't read if you dislike yaoi.  
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**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts D:**

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Roxas sat alone in the back of the classroom next to the window, gazing outside and enjoying the pitter-patter of the rain.

He'd do anything to block out the sound of his classmates, who were currently crowded around Sora's desk.

They were playing some sort of game, and of course, he hadn't been asked to join them.

Not that he cared.

_'How does he do that?' _Roxas asked himself, looking at Sora threw the crowd of people.

As usual, the brunette had a smile on his face, a playful atmosphere around him, everybody loved Sora.

Roxas sighed and looked away, he and his parents moved here when he was about six.

It was fine in the beginning; he had plenty of friends, Hayner, Pence, and Ollette. But they'd all gone their separate ways during their freshman year in high school, he was different after all.

He managed to keep his closest friend, Axel, however he did, he didn't know.

And no matter how hard he tried…..He was always living in Sora's shadow.

Always being compared to Sora, how much better he could be if he followed Sora's example, how many more friends he would have if he acted more like _Sora._

He was always alone, he hated it, he was the reject.

_The Nobody._

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_Axel stood next to his locker, slamming the poor scrap of metal shut angrily.

_'Should I tell him?' _The redhead gripped his hair and growled. _'I really don't want to risk anything....'_

"What's up Axel?"

Axel shook his head, snapped out of his thoughts, he looked to see Sora and Riku standing in front of him.

"Oi, you okay?" Riku asked, wrapping his arm around Sora's waist.

The redhead couldn't help but feel a little pang of jealousy towards the relationship between the two, but he answered anyway, "Yeah, I'm fine...Just thinking."

"Don't hurt yourself." Riku said, turning his head away.

Sora looked up at Axel's face, "Seriously though, are you okay?"

He then proceeded to tell Sora and Riku about his predicament, the silver headed teen didn't really seem to take interest, so he walked away and let Sora handle it. The brunette gave Axel the best advice he could, afterward, they headed outside towards the parking lot.

Sora had made the redhead laugh on numerous occasions, cracking jokes and being the fun person he was.

They didn't seem to notice a certain blond glaring at them from the high school's doorway.

_'I can't make Axel laugh like that...Why can't...' _Roxas growled _'Why can't I have anything!?'_ He snapped.

Sora laughed, "I'll catch you later, kay Axel?" The brunette said, walking away from Axel.

"Alright!"

By this time, Roxas was fuming, jealous and hurt, Roxas angrily walked past Axel and put his headphones in his ears.

"Whoa! R-Roxas wait up!" Axel yelled after him

The blond turned his music up louder, speeding up his pace he quickly turned the corner, with Axel hot on his trail.

"Roxas! Will you stop for a second!?" Axel yelled, grabbing the blond's arm so he couldn't go any further, blond closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down so he wouldn't snap when Axel began talking with him.

" What's wrong?! Why were you walking away from me!?"

"It's nothing Axel." As much as he tried to hide it, his voice was laced with venom.

""Don't give me this bullshit anymore, Roxas you can tell me what's wrong!"

"It doesn't matter what's wrong with_ me_, Axel."

Axel's eyes glazed over, he cared for Roxas, he really did. _'He can never tell me anything he's feeling.'_

_"_...Why can't you be more like Sora?_" _Axel said quietly, letting go of Roxas' arm.

Roxas eyes closed as he felt his heart drop, _'No! Not...Not Axel too!' _The blond lowered his head, "Whether or not I'm more like Sora, Axel. No one needs me here, anyway."

Before Axel could respond, Roxas was already gone half-way down the street.

"That's not true, Roxas.."

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Roxas laid silently on his bed, enjoying the darkness of his home. He loved it when his house was the way it was now. Where Roxas could be Roxas……whomever he may be.

He'd been out of school for days, not that anyone seemed to notice, except Axel of course. The redhead had called everyday since he was gone.

"I guess I just don't care to try anymore."

He didn't want to _try _to be noticed, to _try _to fit in.

Because no matter how hard he did, there was no place for him.

Anywhere.

_'Would Axel love me if I was more like Sora...?'_

Roxas closed his eyes again.

"You're fine the way you are Roxas."

Roxas let his tears fall freely from his eyes, not bothering to wipe them away.

_'He didn't mean it. Did he?' _Roxas laughed bitterly to himself.

The blond got up from his bed heavily and stumbled across his bedroom to his closet.

_'There has to be a way out of this' _Roxas thought as he began rummaging through the small space, looking for a way out of the agonizing loneliness he was in.

He literally destroyed his closet, ripping clothes off he hangers, tearing shelves down from the walls.

Roxas stopped and stared at his answer._ 'I found it.'_

A rope.

It was from when he and Axel went camping a couple of summers ago.

Back when he was truly happy.

Back when he was fine with the way he was.

He took his cellphone out of his pant pocket and text Axel for the last time. After, he closed his cell phone, his tears were falling rapidly now.

Roxas grabbed the chair from his desk with the rope in hand, he stood on his chair, and tied the rope to the base of his ceiling fan.

He breathed out.

And let the chair slip from underneath him.

* * *

Axel sighed, he'd been calling Roxas over and over, but he never got an answer.

He hadn't seen Roxas in days; the blond's parents had gone out of town and a few days after that, Roxas didn't come back to school.

It worried him.

_'Why isn't he answering his phone?'_ Axel leaned back on his worn-out couch, relaxing to the point of slumber, he was woken up by his cell phone.

He quickly grabbed for it, flipping it open.

He had received a text message from Roxas.

**"I'm Sorry."**

Axel furrowed his eyebrows together, _'What?' _

A few minutes later, he received another message.

**"I loved you, Axel."  
**

"What's happening?" The redhead asked himself in a worried tone, he quickly replied back to the message, throwing his cell phone on the couch, he grabbed for his jacket and ran out the door.

**"Goodbye."**

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**Axel had arrived at Roxas's house a few minutes after he received the text messages, he walked up the stairs and opened the door, and surprisingly it was unlocked.

_'It's so dark in here...'_

The redhead walked silently through the dark home, deeper into Roxas' house he found the only hallway with the light on.

He knew Roxas's home quite well, he'd been there enough. He walked down the hallway quietly, feeling awkward as he walked through the eerie house.

The redhead finally ended up at Roxas'sdoor, it was cracked and he pushed it open.

_'He's probably sleeping.'_

_"_Roxas?_"  
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His first instinct was to look at the bed, which was located in the corner of the room. Not finding Roxas there he quickly looked around the the rather large bedroom.

The chair from his desk was laying off to the right on its side.

_'What's going on?'  
_

Axel leaned back to the door to open it more so the room would be well illuminated.

There he was, the one he loved, hanging lifelessly from the ceiling fan.

"R-Roxas!?!" Axel screamed, he stared at Roxas's body, the sorrow struck redhead fell to the floor.

"Axel!! Come on! It's nice out today!"

"R...Roxas no!" By now, the redhead was crying....All those memories, no more could be shared between them.

"Are you okay Axel? Come on lighten up!"

If he had been earlier would this of happened?

If he had noticed the pain Roxas was actually in... could he have stopped him?

So many questions, Axel knew the answer to none.

"Axel."

All he knew was that he loved that boy...And he couldn't tell him that now.

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_After all, no one needs Roxas….right?_

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_**A/N: Man, is it just me or do none of my stories have a happy ending!? XD**

**I based the story off of what **rainbow cupcake **drew, here's the link:**

http:// blackcat- girl. deviantart .com/ art / Roxas -Suicides - Hung -109218318

**(Remove the spaces~ I love her aaaaaart!)**

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